New Definition of Working Late

It's 4 am on a Friday evening, and I am still at work.  

Some would call that crazy, but I call it perfect.  I am not droning over a stark white computer screen or answering phone calls from around the globe.  I am not working late on a report to meet an unreasonable deadline.  For any of that, being at work until 4 am would be crazy.

No, I am still at work staring out into the sea of brightly colored blankets that conceal 40 sleeping middle school girls.

Like I said, perfect. 

Most of the inspiration for my writing comes when my heart is heavy, when my emotions have become so overwhelming that I feel I'm on the verge of collapsing.  Fortunately, this is not one of those blog posts. 

No, tonight I am overwhelmed with gratefulness that I'm still at school at this ghastly hour.   In fact, there is no where in the world I would rather be than sitting here, loving the girls in front of me.

With the help of some of the greatest friends I could ask for, I was blessed to serve 44 middle school girls by offering them a night away from the chaos and the disappointment in their lives.  For one night, these girls could trade make-up, drama, and boys for laughter, whimsy, and musical chairs.  They traded their too-tight shirts and eye rolls for pajama bottoms and giggles.  We laughed over my awkward attempts at Zumba, the 6 inch tear in my pants, and my off-key singing to One Direction.  And these girls made gingerbread houses.  Can I just tell you, only a handful of them had ever made one before.  Only a handful. 

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I am so incredibly humbled that God would call me to "bump" into these young women.  Really? Me? Why?  It's so hard for me to grasp and accept the thought that when He created me, He knew I would one day run into each of these ladies to play a role only He could have designed.  

I wish with my whole being that these girls would see themselves the way I see them- as captivating and remarkable.  I wish they knew how much my heart swells with pride when I see them invite a girl with special needs to play hide and seek or when they give up their seat in musical chairs to let their friend continue playing.  These girls have no idea how much they are capable of or how they are impacting the people around them, namely me. 

And that's when it hit me.  They way I look at these girls is only a glimmer of how God sees me.  He sees my mess ups.  He sees when I roll my eyes or make a snide comment under my breath.  He sees that deep down, I am just an insecure middle girl desperate to belong.  

And yet, He still loves me.  

And because He loved me, the next time an 8th grade girl lies to me or disappoints me, I will continue to love on them.  

Tonight, or I guess this morning, I realize how blessed I am.  God has trusted me with these girls' hearts, and in serving them, I have found so much joy and peace about where my life is heading.  

Again, tonight has been perfect.