A Quiet Break from It All

"Life is rough.  It's also beautiful, but if we can't get some respite from its cruelty, we will never have the healthy vision to savor its tender beauty." (Beth Moore)


My restful reprieve after a very turbulent week and arguably an exhausting few months, came in the form of an afternoon wrapped in my grandmother's knitted blanket, listening to the harmonic blend of instrumental music, children laughing in a neighboring backyard, and lawn mowers and weed trimmers.  Yes, this simplistic day has renewed my spirit.  It was the "respite from [life's] cruelty" that Beth Moore describes. 


My life over the past few months can be characterized by a lack of sleep, an endless series of commitments and obligations, and a feeling of utter exhaustion.  All of this culminated with me sitting in my classroom on a Friday afternoon before break, crying.  I was crying for the hurting kids I am blessed to know and do life with.  I was crying at my own feelings of futility at not being able to do more for them.  I was crying because I am unreservedly sensitive, a tender-heart who struggles with the pain of others.  In fact, I blogged about it all on Friday afternoon, but for the purpose of self-preservation, I have decided not to post it. 


Life was getting me down.  


So my peaceful corner in this world- the enclosed porch of my parents' house on our lake in Indiana, was God's gift of peace and respite.  Psalm 29:11 states, "The Lord gives strength to His people; the Lord blesses His people with peace." I am thankful for a God who loves me enough to gift me with a day like today.  He knew how I desperately I needed it. 


The calm of a good book and a cup of coffee have rejuvenated my spirit.  It is in this time of quiet that I feel most connected to God.  It is so easy to get wrapped up in the appointments, the to-do lists of the day-to-day, that sometimes, God inadvertently takes a backseat.  As much as I try to keep Him centered in everything I do, if I were to be honest, when I get overwhelmed with my schedule, He becomes another thing to check off of my "master list." Guilt-ridden from missing the boat yet again, I fervently try even harder to make Him my ultimate priority.  I do well for a day or so, but life eventually gets busier, and my quiet time with God becomes sporadic.  I end up feeling even more disappointed in myself.


But, this day has been a simple reminder that God loves me.  My earnest and childish attempts to "do better" make Him laugh.  He loves me so completely, so entirely, that while I know He loves spending time with me on these quiet afternoons, He also loves me on my busy, stress-filled days, the days when a simple, "I need You," is all I can mutter.  He is walking with me through it all.  Days like today should be cherished and remembered because I know that my life will inevitably get crazy again. Life will get rough.  But God is there, loving me through it all. 


So Lord, thank you for this break from the hurting, the exhaustion, and the tears.  It is with new vision that I am savoring the beauty of this life.